The Wedding Ideas Place

Marrying a Widow or Widower

Monday, August 30th, 2010, by Bridget Mora, marrying a widow, marrying a widower, pearl earrings, relationships, second marriage, Uncategorized, pearl bridal jewelry, No Comments

First and foremost, when marrying a widower, it is important to realize that he may still love his wife. That does not mean that his love for you is not genuine, but it is still important to realize that in some cases, there may always be a third person in your marriage – the deceased spouse. This is one of the things which is so different about marrying a widower versus a person who was divorced, and it can be hard to deal with at times. On the one hand, it shows that the person has the capacity for great love and devotion, but on the other hand, the new spouse does not deserve to be treated like a second choice. Striking a balance is key.

When marrying a person, you also marry their stuff. In the case of a widow or widower, you might also be marrying their dead spouse’s belongings too. This can be a very delicate situation. To insist that all of the possessions of the widower’s first wife be banished from the house might feel too much to him like you are trying to erase his memories of her. That is insensitive and can cause a real rift, not just in the marriage, but also with his family. At the same time, the new wife should not feel like she necessarily use all of the deceased wife’s possessions, even if there are quite a few around. Your husband may not have the reaction you had hoped if he comes home to find you wearing a pair of his first wife’s pearl earrings.

Family relations can be tricky when marrying someone who lost a spouse, particularly if they had children together. There is a natural tendency to fear that the new wife will push out the memory of mom, and it is up to the new wife to ally those fears in her husband’s children, whether they are young or adults. Showing respect for their mother’s memory – for instance, understanding the desire of the family to commemorate her birthday or visit her final resting place on occasion – will go a long way towards getting your new step-children to feel comfortable with your position in their dad’s life.

Finally, the best way to move forward is to keep your life with your new spouse focused on the present and the future, rather than the past. Take up new hobbies that belong to just the two of you, visit new and exciting destinations that neither of you have ever seen before. With a love of life and a focus on building something new together, the memories of a widow or widower’s first wife can become respected, but not intrusive.

Ideas for Wedding Ring Inscriptions

Sunday, August 29th, 2010, by Bridget Mora, wedding bands, Wedding Jewelry, wedding ring inscriptions, wedding rings, Wedding Jewelry, No Comments

If you are a traditionalist, opt for a classic inscription inside your wedding jewelry. The most traditional thing to engrave in wedding bands is the initials of the couple and the wedding date. Each ring should bear the spouse’s initials first. In other words, if Susan Howard married Richard Jones on June 29, 2011, the engraving inside Susan’s ring would be: RJ 6-29-11 SH. Inside Richard’s band, the initials would be reversed: SH 6-29-11 RJ. If space permits, you could also choose to spell out the date instead of using the letters. The great thing about this classic inscription is that the groom will never have an excuse for forgetting a wedding anniversary!

Many couples like to surprise their spouse with a special sentiment inside the wedding band. Something romantic is always a nice choice. Phrases like “Forever yours” or “Today, tomorrow, forever” are always appropriate. Another idea is to engrave a phrase along with the wedding date, as in “From this moment on…6/29/11”. Keep in mind that if the bride’s band is very petite or has gemstones in it (which may have small cleaning holes behind them) that a long phrase will probably not fit in the space available. On a man’s wedding band, however, you can usually fit quite a bit more.

Humorous messages are also very popular for wedding ring inscriptions. An oldie but goodie is “Put this ring back on!” (usually found inside the groom’s ring). What about a message like “Marriage is a great institution…” – the punchline to that old joke is, “but who wants to live in an institution?”. Some couples also like to surprise one another with humorous messages with a risque tone, such as “Afternoon delight” or…well, you can decide on your own private message! Just remember that the engraver will be reading whatever you want written inside your wedding jewelry!

Some of the best wedding ring inscriptions are those which are inside jokes or pet names between the bride and groom. After all, the message only needs to make sense to two people: the husband and the wife. These can be among the most endearing and meaningful inscriptions, if sometimes pretty silly. For instance, one bride I knew had her husband-to-be’s name engraved in his band, along with the words “My rhino”. One can only imagine what he put in her ring!

Pretty Colors for Spring and Summer 2011 Weddings

Sunday, August 29th, 2010, by Bridget Mora, 2011 wedding colors, bridesmaid jewelry gifts, spring 2011 wedding, summer 2011 wedding, wedding colors, Bridesmaid Jewelry, wedding planning, No Comments

If you love pink, you are in luck, because it is back in style for weddings (not that pink ever really went out of style). This time around, pink will not be paired with brown in an effort to make it more serious and sophisticated. No, pink will be true to itself: girly, pretty, and fun. The particularly hot shade for 2011 weddings is a cheerful flamingo pink. What a fun color for bridesmaid dresses, flowers, table linens, and wedding cakes! Pale pink or clear crystal bridesmaid jewelry gifts would make a great accent to the flamingo bridesmaid dresses.

Purple will still be a popular color for weddings in 2011, but this time it will be in the form of a light and bright lilac hue which just begs to be the signature color for a spring celebration. Although real lilacs do not make for hardy cut flowers, it would be marvelous to have a garden wedding while the lilacs are in bloom around the site. Pretty garden roses and lush ivory peonies would be gorgeous for bouquets and centerpieces. One of the trendy accent shades for 2011 is a pine green color, which pairs exquisitely with lilac. Use it for the invitations, a custom aisle runner (lilac shantung bordered with pine green), and definitely for the cake decorations.

Another fresh and playful hue which will be hot in 2011 is apple green. For a really upbeat wedding color palette, use a combination of flamingo pink, lilac, and apple green, with each color given equal weight. The trio of hues has a wonderful harmonious flow that will make it a piece of cake to use. Be wary of the idea of a rainbow of bridesmaid dresses, like were popular in the 1980s, however. It would look better to pick a patterned dress which features all three colors or select a solid dress and trim it out with a special ribbon trim with the signature hues. Classic bridesmaid jewelry gifts like a pearl tin cup necklace would be best with such colorful frocks. Just think about how gorgeous the wedding flowers will be in a pink, lilac, and apple combination! You could literally use green apples in the centerpiece design for a fresh accent.

Clementine orange is another up-and-coming hue for 2011 weddings. Not quite as bright as a pure orange, but certainly more vivid than peach, it would be a great signature shade for a high summer wedding. Play up the color’s name by choosing a specialty cocktail based on a clementine orange flavor. Clementine would pair beautifully with some of the other new hot colors, such as flamingo pink and apple green, or make a very citrusy palette by mixing it with yellow. With such festive colors on the horizon, 2011 is sure to be a great year to have a wedding!

Wedding Cocktail Hour Alternatives

Sunday, August 29th, 2010, by Bridget Mora, cocktail hour, cocktail hour alternatives, crystal bridal jewelry, wedding receptions, Bridal Jewelry, crystal bridal jewelry, wedding planning, No Comments

It is customary to have some sort of light refreshments between a wedding ceremony and the reception. It is a nice chance for guests to mingle and chat, as well as a good time for the bride and groom to have their portraits taken in their fabulous attire and crystal bridal jewelry. Not every family is into drinking, however, and not every venue permits alcohol. These are some ideas for wedding cocktail hour alternatives.

A mocktail hour is the perfect substitute for a cocktail hour when alcohol is not on the menu. Make it just as festive as the traditional cocktail hour by creating several signature non-alcoholic mocktails to serve to guests. It can be especially fun to create drinks in your wedding colors, because they will look very pretty all lined up to serve. Keep the atmosphere elegant with fancy passed appetizers, a monogram ice sculpture, and grand floral decorations.

In some cases, more simple refreshments are called for. When having a non-alcoholic cocktail reception in a church fellowship hall, for instance, simple finger foods and punch are perfect. If this is a brief stop before heading off to a traditional seated dinner reception, stick to light appetizers, soft drinks, and sparkling water. On the other hand, if the hour after the ceremony will be the full sum of the reception, offer punch served in a beautiful crystal bowl. Make it pretty with an ice ring filled with edible flowers. Naturally, every wedding needs a cake, so be sure to have a special one to serve your guests. A selection of coffee, tea, and soft drinks will round out the menu.

For health nuts, a great cocktail hour alternative would be a bar with fresh squeezed juices and custom blends. Orange juice, lemonade, limeade, tangerine juice, and other fresh drinks will form the base of the menu. If your friends are also very health-conscious, you could even have bartenders on hand to make custom health drinks with shots of wheat grass and other natural additions. Just be sure that the space is decorated to feel more like a tropical bar than the snack bar at the gym. For the food pairings, healthy little bites made with organic veggies, local cheese, and whole grains will be the perfect complement.

Etiquette Mistakes Sure to Offend Your Wedding Guests

Saturday, August 28th, 2010, by Bridget Mora, wedding etiquette, Wedding Jewelry, wedding mistakes, Wedding Jewelry, wedding planning, No Comments

No one means to irritate their wedding guests, but sometimes well-meaning couples make mistakes that end up offending their family and friends. It is such a shame, because normally the bride and groom had only the best intentions when they made their error. Avoid this problem by learning about these etiquette mistakes which are sure to offend your guests.

A ceremony only wedding invitation is a sure-fire way to aggravate people. It is okay to have an intimate marriage ceremony followed by a larger party, but the same is not true in reverse. Can you imagine how upset the guests will be who are invited to the ceremony and then are expected to go home instead of attending the party to follow? No matter how innocent the bride and groom’s intentions may have been, it is guaranteed that those guests will think, oh sure, it’s fine for me to spend a bunch of money on a new dress and wedding jewelry and to buy a gift for the couple, but I’m not good enough to be invited to the party?! Just don’t do it!

Speaking of wedding gifts, people put a lot of their time and money into selecting the perfect present for the happy couple. The time spent writing a thank you note is no where near the amount of time it takes to shop for, wrap, and ship a gift. One thing that will undoubtedly leave a bad taste in the mouths of your guests is to neglect to send them thank you notes for wedding gifts. Handing out pre-printed generic thank you notes (either at the reception or in the mail) is just as bad. In fact, it is almost worse than sending no note, because it shows that you knew that you were obligated to thank your guests, but just couldn’t be bothered to spend a few minutes writing a personal note to each person.

Obvious demands for cash are another way that many couples manage to inadvertently offend their wedding guests. It begins with the wedding invitations which state “cash gifts only please” in the corner. Wow, is that in bad taste! Even if wedding gifts usually are cash where you come from, to actually put it in writing as a demand is just appalling. Nearly as bad are the cutesy things people sometimes do at their wedding receptions to try to get their guests to send some cash their way. There is the dollar dance, the wishing well, and who knows what else. Again, these might be common in some communities, but they really are not appropriate. If your guests want to give you cash for your wedding, they will. And if they prefer to select a gift instead, the bride and groom should be grateful, not irritated that it was not cash!

Gifts for Wedding Officiants

Saturday, August 28th, 2010, by Bridget Mora, groomsmen gifts, wedding officiant gifts, wedding officiants, Uncategorized, No Comments

The appropriate gift for your wedding officiant will depend quite a bit on your relationship with that individual. Some secular officiants may have a set stipend, but it could still be nice to give them a little something additional. A gift certificate to a nice restaurant would be a nice gift for someone that you do not know very well. For an officiant you may know a bit more about, perhaps you can tailor the gift to his or her interests. A set of golf balls and some tees would be great for the j.p. who golfs in his or her spare time, or a coffee table book with pictures by his favorite artist would be perfect for the art lover.

Also think about whether the person did anything special for you. Did your j.p. have to travel 100 miles to a remote country inn to preside over your ceremony? Of course, you would pay for his travel expenses, as well as his food and lodging (if an overnight stay is required), but it would also be nice to thank him for going out of his way. If you know the taste of the person, you can select something more personal, but when unsure, opt for a classic gift. For instance, if your minister spent many extra hours with you and your fiance in pre-marital counseling sessions, perhaps you could give him a handsome pocketwatch will a grateful inscription inside (you can find them at stores which carry groomsmen gifts).

Another way to show your appreciation for your officiant is by inviting that person to both the rehearsal dinner and the wedding reception. If your pastor, rabbi, or j.p. is married, definitely invite their spouse as well. Naturally, you would think carefully about the appropriate dinner companions for your priest or minister when doing the seating chart for your reception! Do not seat your seventy year old family minister with your rowdy fraternity brothers, or for that matter, your young hip j.p. with your ultra-conservative uncle. It may be that the officiant cannot attend, but inviting him or her to your wedding reception is still a very nice gesture to make.

How to Create Fuller Wedding Bouquets

Friday, August 27th, 2010, by Bridget Mora, Bridesmaid Jewelry, wedding bouquet filler, wedding bouquets, Bridal Jewelry, Bridesmaid Jewelry, wedding planning, No Comments

It has long been a secret of floral designers that when trying to fill out a bouquet, you can mix in similar flowers that are less expensive than the signature blossom. So, if you adore the look of pink roses, create a bouquet which primarily features your favorite flower, but fill in between the stems with affordable pink lisianthus. They have a very similar shape, but will bring down the price without detracting from the appearance of the bouquets. This is a great design for a classic wedding where the bridesmaid jewelry and bridal jewelry is timeless pearls.

If your taste runs to the dramatic, big fluffy feathers are a marvelous way to add fullness to your bouquet. Create a smallish arrangement of your favorite blossoms and surround it with a ruff of dramatic feathers. White peacock or ostrich feathers are one option, or have some fun using vibrant colorful peacock feathers. The peacock feathers are absolutely stunning when the colors of the bridesmaid dresses and jewelry are rich jewel tones or a bright teal shade.

You can also create volume by incorporating three dimensional elements into bridal bouquets. This architectural approach to floral design is very stylish and modern. Use long thin elements to create an open “cage” effect around the cluster of flowers. You could use stems of bear grass, grapevine, or even metal wire. Use flowers which will stand out well against the color of the cage wrap material. Fuchsia would be fantastic inside bear grass, yellow inside grapevine, and purple magnificent inside copper colored wire.

One more ingenious way to fill out a bouquet is with fruit. Small green apples, clementines, or other round fruit can be wired right into your floral arrangements. They will add a great pop of color, an unexpected element, and a lush full appearance. Green apples pair beautifully with bright pink flowers, while clementines are fantastic with yellow or orange blooms. The fruit idea is so fun that you will surely want to pull it through into your centerpieces as well.

How to Plan a (Nearly!) Stress Free Wedding

Friday, August 27th, 2010, by Bridget Mora, pearl bridal jewelry, wedding advice, wedding planning, wedding stress, Bridal Jewelry, wedding planning, No Comments

Everyone knows that planning a wedding can be very stress-inducing. Surely it is the strain of the event that turns all of those mild mannered ladies into bridezillas. Between fighting with your mom, getting no help from your fiance, and dealing with the meddling mother in law, it can be enough to make a bride tear her hair out! Before you resign yourself to a year of wedding planning torture, take a look at these tips on how to plan a (nearly) stress free wedding.

Get Organized. Many brides find themselves running around like chickens with their heads cut off because they did not get organized in the very beginning. Of course you will be stressed if you can’t find a decent band available for your wedding in two months or realize that you waited too long to order your dream bridal gown! Conversely, if you get a good wedding planning checklist and follow the timeline religiously, you will never become overwhelmed, because you will have enough time to do each task in a timely manner.

Accept Help. When you become engaged, there will be all sorts of people offering to assist you. Do not brush them off as merely being polite – take them up on their offer! If your sister is willing to spend hours on the Internet looking for exactly the pearl bridal jewelry you envision, let her. If your friend with the impeccable taste wants to visit florists with you, by all means take her along to make your decision making process a snap. Your friends and family can ease a lot of the strain of planning your wedding, if only you will let them.

Know When to Stand Firm and When to Give In. No two people have exactly the same vision of the ideal wedding, especially when it comes to mothers and daughters. But if you battle over every last wine glass and napkin ring, planning your dream wedding will quickly become a nightmare. A great way to reduce stress is to learn when to stand your ground and when to let your mom win a few. For instance, it might be important to you to have a vegetarian menu and it might be really important to her that you wear her pearl bridal jewelry. On the non-negotiable items, firmly but politely stand your ground. On the other details, try to be flexible. Not only will your wedding be beautiful, but planning it may actually turn out to be a pleasant experience.

Wedding Toasts for Brides

Thursday, August 26th, 2010, by Bridget Mora, Wedding Jewelry, wedding toast, wedding toasts for brides, Wedding Jewelry, wedding planning, No Comments

At nearly every wedding, the father of the bride, best man, and groom say a few words during the reception. Often other key members of the wedding will also give short speeches, such as the father of the groom and the maid of honor. While it is not strictly necessary, many brides also give a wedding toast of their own. These are some suggestions on what to say in a bridal wedding toast.

Step number one is to thank everyone for attending. Be sure to say how much it has meant to you that your family and friends traveled from far and wide to be by your side for your wedding. You might want to make a special mention of anyone who put in special effort, like your aunt who flew in from Switzerland, or of any family members you are particularly grateful could make it, such as a brother in the military. If it will not make you too sad, also feel free to make a brief mention of a special relative who could not be there that day, such as your grandmother in the hospital or a sister who is on active duty overseas.

The bride should also plan to say a few words of thanks for those who made her wedding possible, usually her parents. If your maid of honor went above and beyond the call of duty, it would be gracious to mention her in your speech. Certainly a family member who made a unique contribution could also be thanked by name, as in the case of an aunt who made the wedding cake. However, in the interest of brevity, do not use the bridal speech as the time to thank every single person who did anything for your wedding, like giving you your wedding jewelry. To show your gratitude for your friend who lent you her veil or your mother-in-law who gave you your wedding jewelry, do that with a thoughtful handwritten note.

Then it is on to the mushy stuff. A short story about how she met her husband is often part of the bridal toast, assuming it is an appropriate topic for all ages (if you met in a bar, leave that part out). A tear-jerking anecdote about when the bride first realized she was in love with the groom would be another good choice for a toast. Of course, you will want to talk about how happy you are to be his wife and how lucky it has made you feel. There won’t be a dry eye in the house!